Tuesday, December 29, 2009

Post Two-Hundred and Thirteen.

I'm thinking this is my inner demon of sorts.

Post Two-Hundred and Twelve.

I find life to be like a crowded room.

I'm only looking for one person. The one that will never give me the time of day again.

A crowded room can feel awfully lonely.

Monday, November 2, 2009

Post Two-Hundred and Eleven.

No matter all that is going through my mind, I can't find it in me to post.


Some things are left best unsaid to all, I'd say.

Wednesday, October 28, 2009

Post Two-Hundred and Ten.

Sometimes, caring can put you in quite a predicament.

Friday, October 2, 2009

Post Two-Hundred and Nine.

A lot has happened lately.

Hmm, to begin with... I HAVE A NEW BABY SITER, BITCHES. Be jealous. Niko Rose. September 20, 2009.

That's all for now.

Tuesday, September 22, 2009

Post Two-Hundred and Eight.

So, I've come to the conclusion that how I react to some situations can be misleading.

Just because I didn't freak out doesn't mean that I wasn't concerned or didn't care. I do care. I am concerned.

It's just... I'm still internally processing this information, quite honestly. I didn't want to freak over what he said about you, because there had to be a reasonable explanation. I listened to what he said by word of mouth, though I highly doubt there was any discrepancy towards what he really said and what was told to me. I listened to what you had to say about what he said. I highly doubt that what you said wasn't the truth, either.

Though, I'm still a bit curious... a bit left with questions. But, I believe that's for another time, possibly. Or maybe I'll just continue to wonder.

In conclusion, don't get an idea that due to how I reacted, I don't care for you as much as you thought I might. I probably care more than you think I do. But, that's also for another time. You'd be surprised.

Saturday, September 19, 2009

Post Two-Hundred and Seven.

Shirt number three. You'll get it back when I feel like giving it back.

When you let go,
That's the only loneliness known.

Thursday, September 10, 2009

Post Two-Hundred and Six.

I'm in love with this cover.

Post Two-Hundred and Five.


A steady hand of surgical precision
Slice and dice, and a flick of the wrist
One fell swoop; a cut after another
Blood spatter leads to beautiful patterns
Music plays; a classical number
Find myself lost in a hypnotic fashion
Movements keep time with the tempo
All’s revealed; Showtime now
Scalpel down; wipe the forehead
Maniacal grin and bloodlust eyes
I reach in, hand bare
Wrist disappears with the
Sloshing of fluids and the
Squish of entrails

Monday, September 7, 2009

Post Two-Hundred and Four.

Thursday, September 3, 2009

Post Two-Hundred and Three.

The Loyal Keokuk High School Morning Library Crew have started a petition to get Rita to have to be in earlier like she used to.

Rad, indeed.

Wednesday, September 2, 2009

Post Two-Hundred and Two.

So, until further notice, my blog will be used as a means of printing my papers at school. I haven't set up my pc to the server printer yet. (:

Emily Clark
Cody Lambert
English Comp 105
Period 1
“Yo dogg!”
“Wut’s up?!”
“Where my money at?!?”
“I spent it all. It’s mine!”
“Hommie, don’t me making me angry and wutnot.”
“I ain’t afraid of you.”
“Don’t make me get my 9, fo’sho.”
“Bring it. Don’t make me get my baby daddy!”
“Fine, go get his old honkey ass!”
“It’s on like Donkey Kong!”
“Fo’ shizzle!”

Tuesday, September 1, 2009

Post Two-Hundred and One.

Brookesany deGuzman
Jennifer Tripp
English Comp 105; Period 1
Mrs. Edler
“Sup, wanker?”
“Your mum, innit?”
“Pffft, your mum’s fit.”
“Can we please stop talking about me mum?”
“Right sensitive, aren’t we? Anyways, what’s that you’ve got there?”
“What does it look like? It’s a birdfish!”
“It looks like a bloody terrifying shark!”
“Right, like it’s going to bite you or something. What do you want me to do? Get the sea police over here or something?”
"Bollocks, no. What do you take me for? We're in the bloody hall."
“Brilliant, really… absolutely brilliant you are.”
“Aye, that’s what your mum said last night.”
“Oi, piss off! I’m off to class.”
“Fine, fine. Come ‘round tonight, briefcase wanker. My dad’s out.”
“Ooh, at last, then!”
“…No, I mean going out.”
“No, he’s playing badminton, actually.”
“That’s a euphemism.”
“Piss off. Tonight, don’t forget.”

Saturday, August 29, 2009

Post Two-Hundred.

Eventually, it'll probably get to the point that I've worn all your over-shirts to bed. This makes two. I wonder how long it'll take for you to notice without me telling you.

Gawd, I suck at the Wii. Dx

Post One-Hundred and Ninety-Nine.

You're way too good for me.

Friday, August 28, 2009

Post One-Hundred and Ninety-Eight.

Brookesany deGuzman
Mrs. Edler
English Comp 105
Period 1
A Late Thank You

This life of mine was made possible
For you were the one to bring me into it.
Able to wash away my fears
With a comforting smile;
A voice warm as the sun.
A teacher;
A nurturer;
A friend.
I love you,

You’re the one I look up to.
So strong, yet so scared.
You’ve accomplished dreams
I only wish to.
Worked hard to provide
The necessities for me and more.

Sometimes, it may appear
As if I don’t care about
The things you do for me.
Alas, that’s far from it.
If anything, grateful
Is a word
That doesn’t come close
To describing the truth.
The best I can say
Is thank you…
For all you’ve put yourself through.

Thursday, August 27, 2009

Post One-Hundred and Ninety-Seven.

We attempted to go to the watermelon festival today. We were rained out, but I think we all still enjoyed ourselves. I enjoyed myself. The rain... oh, how much I love the rain.

Lingers. Lingers.
A comfort comes with.

Wednesday, August 26, 2009

Post One-Hundred and Ninety-Six.

Sometimes... sometimes. You're better than you think.

Off subject, but I wish I had the guts to do something like this sometimes.

Sunday, August 23, 2009

Post One-Hundred and Ninety-Five.

I found it kinda funny when you offered to carry me over to your car to tell you goodbye, since Lisa was wearing my sandals and we were walking in gravel. I would've had to walk back in the gravel no matter what, unless you wanted to carry me back to the garage, silly.

Gah, I feel silly.

Friday, August 21, 2009

Post One-Hundred and Ninety-Four.

Tonight was probably one of the my favourites in a while.

Wednesday, August 19, 2009

Post One-Hundred and Ninety-Three.

The first day of school was interesting, to say the least. Though, only going to my first period would be a reason why. Talking to the "Freshman Academy" during second and third about the GSA... honestly, I hope it was worth it. A bunch of them didn't seem interested at all, and were making fun of the club. But, I guess you'll have that. One kid was exceptionally rude while Jennifer and I were talking, and we both wanted to cut a bitch. Arrrrrgh, yes. I'm a bit happy for the freshmen to be separated from the rest of the school.

I need to stop being so awkward around you. It would probably help if we talked more often. Maybe I should actually try. Then again, I'm quite afraid to make an effort.

Monday, August 17, 2009

Post One-Hundred and Ninety-Two.

I've got a lot on my mind lately.

Sunday, August 9, 2009

Post One-Hundred and Ninety-One.

I miss mommy and Chad... and even Devin, sucker. D:

I think I'm tired of dreading this being my last high school year. It's just high school.

Saturday, August 8, 2009

Post One-Hundred and Ninety.

I sometimes wonder if all I do is pretend.

Friday, August 7, 2009

Post One-Hundred and Eighty-Nine.

With some situations, I find that I don't know what I really want.

School starts soon.

When we registered, I had to make my schedule over... with Mr. Benda. DCan't stand that man one bit.

SCC Gen Psych
Art II
SCC Pre-Cal
US Gov/Politics
SCC Eng Comp I

Might get open lunch for next semester. I don't know yet, honestly. If I can't get Art Problems next semester, I will smite Mr. Benda. D< h8 h8 h8 h8 h8

End rant.

Thursday, August 6, 2009

Post One-Hundred and Eighty-Eight.


Sunday, August 2, 2009

Post One-Hundred and Eighty-Seven.

In your dreams, right?

Post One-Hundred and Eighty-Six.

I would've rather had the actual video, but embedding was disabled.

Have I ever told you that I love Blink?

Saturday, August 1, 2009

Post One-Hundred and Eighty-Five.

I know all my friends will be excited for me to be back.

But, honestly, I don't want to go back. I'm gone after this year. I realized how deadbeat Keokuk is.

Wednesday, July 22, 2009

Post One-Hundred and Eighty-Four.

I cracked and joined Twitter.



Wednesday, July 15, 2009

Post One-Hundred and Eighty-Three.

Post One-Hundred and Eighty-Two.

I wanna believe in everything that you say, 'cos it sounds so good...

Haha, right.

Anyway, I'm getting my hair dyed yellow and blue eventually this summer. Also, I'm getting my lip pierced and maybe my ears gauged. Yeah, I'm excited.

Monday, July 13, 2009

Post One-Hundred and Eighty-One.

Wonder Girls!

Post One-Hundred and Eighty.

Eels... up inside ya, suycka.

Sunday, July 12, 2009

Post One-Hundred and Seventy-Nine.

Wednesday, July 8, 2009

Post One-Hundred and Seventy-Eight.

This is for you Jenjen.

Tuesday, July 7, 2009

Post One-Hundred and Seventy-Seven.

Monday, July 6, 2009

Post One-Hundred and Seventy-Six.

The dreams in which I'm dying are the best I've ever had

Saturday, July 4, 2009

Post One-Hundred and Seventy-Five.

Post One-Hundred and Seventy-Four.

This picture made me think ever having kids may be worthwhile.
Childhood is a magical thing.

Never say good-bye
because saying good-bye means going away,
and going away means forgetting.
~ Peter Pan

Friday, July 3, 2009

Post One-Hundred and Seventy-Two.

Are we more than marionettes?
Who is your puppet master?

Thursday, July 2, 2009

Post One-Hundred and Seventy-Two.

No one wants to walk the road alone.

Post One-Hundred and Seventy-One.

This reminded my of my little Pocky (aka Nerji).

So, since I've been in AB... I have... gone to the beach most every day; gotten a sort of sun burn; played up to disk 3 in Final Fantasy IX; and visited the local Wal-Mart, Food Lion, and Dollar Tree.

Awesome, right.

Tuesday, June 30, 2009

Post One-Hundred and Seventy.

"We all carry these things,
Inside that no one else can see.
They hold us down like anchors.
They drown us out at sea.
I look up to the sky.
There may be nothing there to see.
But if I don't believe in him,
Why would he believe in me?"

I don't know why, but I really wanted to be sure I could remember these lyrics for a later time.

Monday, June 29, 2009

Post One-Hundred and Sixty-Nine.

Answer me this, anyone.

What makes you tick?
What pushes your buttons?

We're all fools to believe in immortality.

Alas, poor Yorick! I knew him, Horatio: a fellow
of infinite jest, of most excellent fancy: he hath
borne me on his back a thousand times; and now, how
abhorred in my imagination it is! my gorge rims at
it. Here hung those lips that I have kissed I know
not how oft. Where be your gibes now? your
gambols? your songs? your flashes of merriment,
that were wont to set the table on a roar? Not one
now, to mock your own grinning? quite chap-fallen?
Now get you to my lady's chamber, and tell her, let
her paint an inch thick, to this favour she must
come; make her laugh at that.

But, why wallow? You've one life, yes? Then, don't regret. No matter what is thrown at you, take it head on.

From this point on, I don't want to regret. I want to apologize for all the wrong I've done to others. I want to grow. I want to learn. I want to live. I want to turn over a new leaf, yet not abandon the old.

Post One-Hundred and Sixty-Eight.

Alright, so... I just woke up from a freaking weird dream.

It started out as my friends and I were all at this sorta water park, but it was at a lake that had rapids and such. Don't ask. And we were there for days making friends with all who worked there and such. For some reason Chad worked there. Hmm. Then the whole place flooded. But, everyone got out fine. Fast forward a bit. We started getting haunted by the "Lady of the Lake". It was weird. Some guy that me and someone else were going through the cliffs with died because of the Lady of the Lake... um, that's when the haunting started. Like... we looked down a hole in one of the cliffs and that's where this pump is to pump water from, though it doesn't make sense because it is freaking coming out of the water. But, it starts pumping by itself and blood comes out... so we're like, "OMGizzle, she killed _____!" I don't remember his name. Then we're back in what kinda looks like my dad's house, but it isn't. She kept wanting me to kill Haley Fuller. Ahahahaha. That was the best part. Then for some reason my father in the dream was Fred Flinstone and my mother was sorta like the mom from Married with Children, only more attractive. And well, the Lady of the Lake had me convinced my father was dead 'cos I kept seeing his ghost with these special glasses I had that could see spirits or whatever. And... for some reason, the graveyard she was buried in was in our kitchen... and we were all sleeping on the floor in the living room. Devin was freaking out because his head was closest to the graveyard and he thought the Lady was going to get him, so he moved to sleep by me. The thing was, she didn't want to hurt any of us purposely. So, I ended up talking to her and figured everything out and set her spirit free. Then it was Chad's birthday and our mom made him a veggie burger instead of a cake. She burned it... o.O, but he ate it anyway.

Friday, June 26, 2009

Post One-Hundred and Sixty-Seven.


It is quite hard to keep in contact with Keokukians (Is that what they're referred to?) when I'm either not around when they're online or they don't go on Facebook often.

You guys suck! D< Kidding.

Right. Anyway. Yey sun.

Saturday, June 20, 2009

Post One-Hundred and Sixty-Six.

So, today was my last full day in Keokuk. Or, I guess yesterday... since it is now technically Saturday. It was fun... I'd say bittersweet.

I loved seeing the ones closest to me come by to see me off and bid farewell, since I told them no way could they see me when my grandpa comes to pick me up. NO WAY. I'd be all like "OMGAWD I LOVE YOU GUISE SO MUSSSSH." etc. etc. It'd be ridiculous. I'd be embarrassed.

So, I told them it'd be okay to welcome me back, though. Ahahaha. Then they can meet my mommy and Chad and be all like "SO THAT IS WHY YOU ARE SO AWESOME!" And I'll be all, "Uh, durh."

Wurd, lyfe.

Anyways. So, Stephanie arrived first. We chilled. Jennifer arrived. We chilled some more. Hung out outside, hung out inside. JENNIFER GAVE ME THE GREATEST PRESENT EVER! PAC-MAN SHOES OMG! I loves her. Q.Q So much. So much. We had a marker fight in attempt of me keeping her here. I also hit her with a pair of pantyhose that I put a bar of soap in. She wasn't injured.

Then, well... I climbed on the front of her car and wouldn't get off so she drove down the hill with me on it. I thought she'd drive all the way to her house, but she didn't. So, I asked her for a ride back up the hill. (: I LOVE YOU SO MUCH JENJEN OMGIZZLE I'M FOR SERIOUS! YOU ARE THE SISTAH I'VE NEVER HAD FOR SERIOUS!

Stephanie was bouts to go when I got a call from Dylan. He said he was sorry that he'd prolly not make it over, and that was chill. You could hear Cody in the background trying to whisper, "Tell her we're coming." So, Cody stole the phone and said they'd were on their way and would be there in a few minutes. No lie, it took like two minutes. Dylan got out. Cody stole the Torrent and Hunter and him went to McDonalds. Stephanie left. I'll miss her. ): Defo have to chill when I get back. So, Dylan was stranded at my house without his car or his phone. They came back with sweet tea for him. It tasted pretty well. Cody put the Love station of for XM radio. Sometimes, ... all the time... he's very unsubtle. So are most people I know. It's okay, though. Dylan walked me to my door and we said our goodbyes and I'll miss yous. I promised to call when I got to NC. etc.s Then, I found the front door to be locked. xD Good thing I found the spare key. Ahahahahaha.

Good day, all in all. To those I'm leaving, I'll miss you. AND I WANT MY STUFF BACK THAT I'M LEAVING TO YOU GUYS. Kidding, you can keep it... except my Bayside sweat band. I'll trade you something in return for that back. I wonder if Dylan ever got my gift I left to him. Forgot to ask Cody. Anyways. To those I'm seeing soon, I can't wait!

Thursday, June 18, 2009

Post One-Hundred and Sixty-Five.

So, Facebook said that this was the Taylor Swift song for me. Interesting indeed. I don't... know if I agree? Who knows.

I'm sorry things happened how they did. But, you'll find someone better in time. Keep your chin up.

Post One-Hundred and Sixty-Four.

This couple is amazing. xD

Post One-Hundred and Sixty-Three.

I'm going to miss you guys a lot, but I can't wait to see my mom and Chad again. I'm super excited, I won't lie.

I've been breaking out a lot lately. It is RIDICULOUS! Plus, I'm out of conditioner. Just so you all know, lotion is not a substitute for conditioner. I just thought I'd throw that out there. Don't give me that look.

Monday, June 15, 2009

Post One-Hundred and Sixty-One.

You were in my dream last night. It wasn't a far out dream. My other dream was, though.

We were all just hanging out at Jenjen's and watching movies like we always do. Nothing really weird or anything went on. I was just playing with your hands. Don't ask me why... I have no idea.

My weird dream was... weird.I was in a car with my uncles and my mom and Devin and some girl. I can't quite remember who she was right now. We went to some mall that I've never been to before and we had a baby with us in a stroller. There were plastic sheets in front of the doors to the shops that I kept slipping on and falling. There was a lot of Star Trek memorabilia. I picked out a puzzle box for my mom for her birthday that had 5 puzzles that were all 1,764 pieces... I don't think those exist. It was shown to her before I bought it and she didn't get why I was picking it out for her because it had Spock and Lady Gaga on it. So I told her it was a puzzle for her to remember me forever because the puzzles were Spock, Lady Gaga, a scene from Fight Club, and two others that are really hazy in my mind at the moment.

I need to stop wearing those stretchy head band things to bed it would seem. They're giving me weird dreams.

Sunday, June 14, 2009

Post One-Hundred and Sixty.

Sometimes, I find you ridiculously adorable... just so you know.

So, time with the family wasn't too bad. Kinda entertaining. Etc. etc.

We're lighting fireworks tonight. It could be fun.
I need to start packing clothes.

Saturday, June 13, 2009

Post One-Hundred and FIfty-Nine.

I wish I dreamed every night. Or at least had dreams that I'd remember. Then, my sleep would be more interesting. Then, I'd have a story to tell in the morning.

Friday, June 12, 2009

Post One-Hundred and Fifty-Eight.

I'm not looking forward to my relatives visiting this weekend.

...I'd much rather hang out with you lot.

Thursday, June 11, 2009

Post One-Hundred and Fifty-Seven.

It has been pretty boring since you left. But, at least you're having fun.

I've been sleeping so much lately.

I had a weird freaking dream last night. Everyone was there. And... well, it was like we were all wizards and witches like straight from Harry Potter. Actually, he was there... and so was everyone else. It ended with Devin getting mad at me in a car as I was trying to cast spells on him to protect him because he didn't want to go back into the house... EVEN THOUGH THE WHAT I GUESS WAS THE DARK LORD WAS AFTER US! So, in the back seat where we were... there was this huge freaking painting with a super heavy wooden frame. So, he hits me in the back of the head with it and starts running. But, I catch him and cast some spells on him. Like... yeah. It was kind of weird. But, he was still resisting after I cast a sort of shield bubble spell and this weird gold spec spell. I wish I could remember what we had to say to cast them... but the girl with me, when she cast it... her specs were pink, not gold. Anyway... so he was resisting... so I freaking Expelliarmus'ed him.

Then I woke up.

Sunday, June 7, 2009

Post One-Hundred and Fifty-Six.

Dawn of the Dead... sucks. Very bad. It was epically awful in a hilarious sort of way. I laughed a good deal.

You're not going to be with me next year, so I don't understand why you have to be such a jerk to me. I really don't appreciate it.

I just want to say... I am in love with this version. Seriously, I am.

Thursday, June 4, 2009

Post One-Hundred and Fifty-Five.

Is it okay that I've been getting butterflies pretty often?

Right now, I'm not complaining.

Tuesday, June 2, 2009

Post One-Hundred and Fifty-Four.

I wonder what the plan is for today.

Monday, June 1, 2009

Post One-Hundred and Fifty-Three.

My foot is better--much better.

I'm deathly bored, but there isn't much to do.

Sunday, May 31, 2009

Post One-Hundred and Fifty-Two.

So, let's see...

The Chicago trip was moved to next weekend. Which is cool, fo' sho'. That meant I could go to Burlington with everyone for Dylan's birthday.

So, we had a super secret mission of sneaking me in the very back of the Torrent as to surprise Dylan, right. Jenjen took Dylan and Cody around the back of her house after the guys came to pick Jenjen up. Hunter stayed on the porch to help me into the Torrent. ... my luck would have it, Dylan locked all the doors. So, I'm hiding behind the Torrent, yes. We have to do a super quick secret diversion of Jenjen needing her hoodie out of the back and me rolling into the Torrent. That was successful. Now, we waited. Jenjen said the secret word (Chipmunk) and I popped out all nonchalant-like out of the back. ... he didn't notice. xD So, I'm just talking away and chilling out. We pull into the school parking lot to wait and meet up with Russel... and he looks back in the rear-view mirror. Ahahahaha, his look was priceless.

I think Jenjen won best present award.

That trip was interesting. Seeing as I was a cripple, (still am) I kept sitting down on the floor periodically because of all the walking. We also did some super secret operation with me in shopping carts and singing the Mission Impossible theme song. We all bought a bunch stuff. Most people, when they turn eighteen, buy porn... or are excited that they can buy porn. Dylan was excited that he could buy his own knives. Ah, this kid is jokes.

Most memorable moment of the trip: Total carnage released on Johanna. Even if I kinda felt bad for her, I must say... no one is going to forget that.

After the trip, we came back to Dylan's house and chilled. Then, left and ordered pizza and chilled in Wal-mart as it was being made. They saw Mr. Muston. Cody S. (not the Cody we hang out with) was there and being a total creeper as usual. We got the pizzas and went to the park. Fo wurd.

Cake and then bonfire at Dylan's afterward.

We kissed--even if the first attempt was totally jokes. Thanks you guys a lot. No, I'm being serious. It was hilarious. ... we really had no idea that Russel was even there. We forgot about Russel. :/

All in all, Dylan's birthday was a success. He enjoyed it. Everyone pretty much enjoyed themselves, give or take a few. It was fun.

Happy Eighteenth, Tiger.

Thursday, May 28, 2009

Post One-Hundred and Fifty-One.

4th Period.
Listening to BrokeNCYDE.
Eating cookies.

The end.

Post One-Hundred and Fifty.

Half a day left of school.
... I won't know what to do with myself.

Oh, geeze.

Almost Dylan's birthday.

Time to watch Inbetweeners!

Post One-Hundred and Fourty-Nine.

I'm sorry it didn't work.
I'll make it up to you.
I'll make it up to all of you.

Chicago, here I come.


In other words, I have a new series I'm in love with... thanks to Nerji.
It's called Inbetweeners.

It is seriously feckin' epic. Pure jokes, the whole thing.

Tuesday, May 26, 2009

Post One-Hundred and Fourty-Eight.

Sup Jennifer.
How's it going?
I'm pretty beasting myself.

T-Rex Muston is rad.
Ahahaha... T-Rex.

Post One-Hundred and Fourty-Seven.

Jennifer, Dylan, and Hunter are sitting in front of me.
... In that order.

You three suck.

Post One-Hundred and Fourty-Six.

Literature in Action
Final Paper − Book of Choice

Your final paper will be worth 150 points. It should be typed, double-spaced, and free of grammatical and mechanical errors. The due date is May 27th. Senoirs' due date is May 20.

  1. Give the title, author, and genre of your novel.

  2. Describe the setting. How does the setting contribute to the overall story? (20 pts)

  3. Who are the main characters? Give two examples from your book which reveal their personalities. What is the narrative point of view? (20 pts)

  4. What is the main conflict of the novel, and how is it resolved? (30 pts)

  5. What is the theme of your book? Support your answer by describing two incidents that reveal the theme. (30 pts)

  6. Why did you choose this book? Describe two events from your book which you can relate to. Add anything else that is significant about your book! (20 pts)

  7. Choose three quotes from your novel that had a significant impact on the reading, or made you stop and think. Include the page number where the quote is found. Explain why the quote is important to the reading, or to you. (30 pts)

I don't remember when she handed this out. Guess what I get to do tonight? Book has been chosen. Ready, set, go.

Speak by Laurie Halse Anderson.

Just so you know, I watched the Lifetime movie before I read the book. I never knew the title of the movie. Then, I read the book and noticed all the similarities. Interesting. Interesting indeed.

Monday, May 25, 2009

Post One-Hundred and Fourty-Five.

It breaks my heart every time I see you face fall. I don't like seeing you upset. So, I'm sorry that I'm the reason for you feeling down. That's why I don't like talking about me leaving. But, it's only for the summer. I promise to be back. I'll try and keep you smiling. You'd be surprised to know how happy I am when you smile.

Sunday, May 24, 2009

Post One-Hundred and Fourty-Four.

So, here is the result of me Stumble!ing. The Stumble app for Firefox is just so entertaining.

“ A guy out there was meant to be the love of your life, your best friend, your soul mate, the one you can tell your dreams to. He’ll brush the hair out of your eyes. Send you flowers when you least expect it. He’ll stare at you during the movies, even though he paid $8 to see it. He’ll call to say goodnight or just cause he is missing you. He’ll look in your eyes and tell you, you’re the most beautiful girl in the world, and for the first time in your life, you’ll believe it. ”

-Nicholas Sparks

“I keep waiting to meet a man who has more balls than I do. ”

-Salma Hayek

Post One-Hundred and Fourty-Three.

"The saddest kind of sad is the sad that tries not to be sad. You know, when Sad tries to bite its lip and not cry and smile and go, “No, I’m happy for you”? That’s when it’s really sad."

- John Mayer

Friday, May 22, 2009

Post One-Hundred and Fourty-Two.

Classes for next year:
  • US Gov/Politics

  • Aerobics Quarter 1

  • Aerobics Quarter 3

  • Dance Quarter 2

  • Racquet Sports Quarter 4

  • Drama

  • Photography

  • Art II Semester 1

  • Art Problems Semester 2

  • SCC General Psych

  • SCC Abnormal Psych

  • SCC English Comp I

  • SCC English Comp II

  • SCC Fundamental Speech

  • SCC Pre-Calculus

  • AP Online US History

Well, those are the ones I signed up for, anyway.

I took the Compass test for English and Math. Supposedly, I'm the only one in my group that actually passed the math test. Though, it was barely so... 3 points over what I needed. Jeeze. So glad that I didn't have to take it again, though.

Icing on the cake, who I like likes me back. Ha.

Wednesday, May 20, 2009

Post One-Hundred and Fourty-One.

Things have been looking up again.

Tuesday, May 12, 2009

Post One-Hundred and Fourty.

I've been wondering if I should keep pretending as if I don't know he knows.

I've also been wondering if I should take action.

I have a new friend. Her name is Hootie. She's a stuffed dark blue owl plush. She's eco-friendly because her stuffing was made 100% out of recycled plastic bottles.

Monday, May 11, 2009

Post One-Hundered and Thirty-Nine.

Thirteen days.

I honestly can't wait. Can you?

Sunday, May 10, 2009

Post One-Hundred and Thirty-Eight.

Ever tell you that I hate the lit portfolio?

Well, just so you know... I do. ): It isn't even that hard to do... It is just so damned time consuming. 1/6 reflections done! 0/1 Conclusions done!

In due time... in due time.

I stumbled along this quote... no seriously, I used stumble upon. Anywho, here's a good old Bob Marley for ya. Also, a cover of Love Story I also Stumbled Upon!
“ You may not be her first, her last, or her only. She loved before she may love again. But if she loves you now, what else matters? She’s not perfect - you aren’t either, and the two of you may never be perfect together but if she can make you laugh, cause you to think twice, and admit to being human and making mistakes, hold onto her and give her the most you can. She may not be thinking about you every second of the day, but she will give you a part of her that she knows you can break - her heart. So don’t hurt her, don’t change her, don’t analyze and don’t expect more than she can give. Smile when she makes you happy, let her know when she makes you mad, and miss her when she’s not there."
— Bob Marley


Post One-Hundred and Thirty-Seven.

I'm not sure if I should be happy or not that he knows I like him.

Honestly, I don't know about many things. Though, I do know that Lenard Nimoy looks damn well for his age. Yes, he is my hero.

Friday, May 8, 2009

Post One-Hundred and Thirty-Six.

Sometimes, the Beatles just know exactly what to say.

Yeah, I'm on a Beatles kick lately. I've been constantly listening to them.

Thursday, May 7, 2009

Post One-Hundred and Thirty-Five.

I love going to the park. I've loved these past few days... they're the most fun I've had in ages. I feel so at home. The sand. The sun. The grass. The fun. The love. The friends.

I can smell you're just around the corner.

These school walls are confiding me. Trapped. We're all trapped. Summer's coming. We're breaking free.

Tuesday, May 5, 2009

Post One-Hundred and Thirty-Four.

Anyone else remember what yesterday was? Or, am I the only one super sick to my stomach.

Sometimes I think that I think too much.

Like how I kept thinking that you'd randomly show up for the Reenactment like you promised... or for my birthday.

Silly girls think silly thoughts.

Saturday, May 2, 2009

Post One-Hundred and Thirty-Three.

Ok so, I was reading this survey I posted on Facebook ages ago... and well, this question/answer just made me realize how absolutely nerdy and sappy I am.

42. FAVORITE SOUND(S). Hearts beating, music in the background, typing on a keyboard, Final Fantasy battle music, and the surprised noise the guards make on Metal Gear.

Right. Haha. Anywho. I checked out, with Jenjen's library card, a biography on Bruce Lee and a SAT prep book. My dad is like... in love with the first book. ahahaha. But, c'mon, it is Bruce Lee after all. (:

I went with Jenjen and her mom to Quincy to pick out my birthday present from them. It is uber cute. Though, not something I'd normally wear. I think it is time to expand my wardrobe choices. (: We also went to TGI Fridays... they got the staff to sing to me and give me ice cream. Q.Q Then, they wouldn't eat any of it. D:!

THREE VIDEOS! Because, well... it is my birthday, and I can't get these songs outta my head and this scrubs clip is epic.

Friday, May 1, 2009

Post One-Hundred and Thirty-Two.

It will be my birthday in less than an hour.

... it is kinda funny that I'm nowhere near excited.

I wonder if you even remember.

Thursday, April 30, 2009

Post One-Hundred and Thirty-One.


Post One-Hundred and Thirty.

The balloon was a success... er, I mean Deloris was a success. Jordy picked the name, not me. Mr. Sellers wants to keep it to hang up on his wall of past projects. So, sweet.

School's nearing an end.
I need to work on my projects.

Monday, April 27, 2009

Post One-Hundred and Twenty-Nine.

I've given up Edge. No, that doesn't mean I'm going to be drinking and drugging up all the time. I've still yet to have a drink or anything like that. It is just, y'know, I never "X"d up because I never felt a need. It wasn't because it was a hassle, but it was just because I chose not to do so. Technically, I'm still Edge right now, even if I'm not being committed to the oath. Whatever.

This doesn't mean I'm a failure or a quitter. I'm opening up to opportunities, I guess? No, I'm not going to get high or do other drugs with you. I'd rather not do that stuff, to be honest. One day, maybe I'll take a drink, but hey... for the time being, I'm going to wait until the stuff is legal for me.

I'm hoping this hot air balloon works. The colours are jokes... because I ran out of enough pink and lime green for the 5th panel. So... 4/5 panels are pink and lime green... the other panel is yellow and blue. Can I say roflcopters? I think I did.

in da crowd you finna get hit

Monday, April 20, 2009

Post One-Hundred and Twenty-Eight.

I'm still really sleepy. Sleepy. Sleepy.

I've had a good talk with a friend. I've realized things happen the way they do because that's how the bricks are intended to fall. No, it wasn't destiny or fate set in stone. Choices were made and paths were decided. I'm not sorry for this. I'm just sorry some of the choices I made weren't because I really had the option, but because I was given no other choice. Though, that's okay. I'm going to continue to let these bricks fall where they may. Things will work out how they're intended to eventually. And, well, I can wait for eventually.

Post One-Hundred and Twenty-Seven.

This is all jokes.
You're all jokes.
That is all.

Friday, April 17, 2009

Post One-Hundred and Twenty-Six.

In my opinion, Day of Silence was really successful. No one wrote disrespectful things on our sign we left up for people to sign to show their support of the cause. Some people were jerks and kept trying to get many of us to speak. That was a bit annoying. But, it really informed some people. Mrs. Marsot told me at the end of the day that a senior we're all to familiar with (LP) actually asked her all surprised like if we had gay people in our school.

Did you guys know that the school I went to last year, West Carteret High School (Morehead City, NC), doesn't have a GSA? Some students tried to start one and the Board of Education turned them down.

It's crazy.

Thursday, April 16, 2009

Post One-Hundred and Twenty-Five.

Tomorrow is Day of Silence... just thought I should throw that out there.

Within darkness, there is a light to guide you through the hardest of trials and tribulations. A smile in a sea of frowns. Your burden is one in which you don't have to bare alone.

Wednesday, April 15, 2009

Post One-Hundred and Twenty-Four.

I wonder how long I'll keep up with this blogging thing.

Gotta take notes for a book talk tonight that I'm doing tomorrow. Um, write a short 4 paragraph essay for the same class on the same book...

10 problems for Chemistry.

Get this all done before Friday!

Sunday, April 12, 2009

Post One-Hundred and Twenty-Three.

I don't know what to expect out of life.

I think I want to end with knowing I've had a profound moment. That would be nice.

Post One-Hundred and Twenty-Two.

Jennifer's rave was fun... though, not everyone wanted to dance. I danced almost the whole time. It was awesome. I'm still sore. It hurts to walk. Happy Birthday. xD

Yesterday, I went to Quincy. I got my prom shoes. I got some prom jewelry. Prom is weird.

Thank you Jessica for getting this song stuck in my head.

Tuesday, April 7, 2009

Post One-Hundred and Twenty-One.

I'm not any better than I was the first day. I don't miss him. I miss who I thought he was.

“Numbing the pain for a while will make it worse when you finally feel it.”
~J.K. Rowling

I'm going to be strong. I promised myself to get over this.

Monday, April 6, 2009

Post One-Hundred and Twenty.

So, Jennifer's birthday/mini-party was Saturday. Amber's was Sunday. Both were fun in their own retrospect. Cake fight. Oh, geeze. Cake was everywhere. My boogies turned blue 'cos of the frosting stuff. Happy Birthday to Jenjen and Amber.

Friday, April 3, 2009

Post One-Hundred and Nineteen.

I'm pretty much in love with this web comic.

Tuesday, March 31, 2009

Post One-Hundred and Eighteen.

The grass is growing.
The ground is soft and muddy.
Spring, oh spring...
I missed you.

I found this to be super cute.

Monday, March 30, 2009

Post One-Hundred and Seventeen.

Is it funny how in a crowded room, you still can feel alone?
Is it out of the ordinary that you could be having the greatest time ever, then the next thing you know, something reminds you of things and you feel lower than dirt?

Life amuses me sometimes.
I've smiled a lot lately, but it still feels like I have a permanent frown.
I'm not sad.
I'm confused.
I'm ready for the future.
Wings spread.
Open arms.
I think I can take on anything.

Sunday, March 29, 2009

Post One-Hundred and Sixteen.

I enjoyed myself last night. That was probably the most fun I've had in the last few weeks.

Can you believe this school year is almost over? I'm going to be a Senior next year--a freaking Senior! It is crazy that my high school journey is almost over.

This song has been in my head the past few days.

Friday, March 27, 2009

Post One-Hundred and Fifteen.

I'm so tired lately... so worn down. I'm on a Veronicas kick. The play last night was decent. The script was cute... a few different actors would've been better. It was entertaining having Zen as our stage director... kept us entertained up in the light/sound booth. Fun times.

So, I won't lie... I was watching the Disney Channel. Honestly, because Devin was watching it. Anywho, this video came on between shows and I liked it.

Wednesday, March 25, 2009

Post One-Hundred and Fourteen.

Do you ever feel like you've gone backwards?

You've built up an immunity of sorts and you're moving forward in life. Next thing you know, you find yourself back to where you were in the beginning.

I've built walls around myself my whole life. I've allowed them to be chipped away and let people invade my sanctuary. They've left it a mess--rubble as if a post-war scene. Most would want to clear the mess and rebuild. But, you know what? If one were to do that, they'd just have to rebuild the next time. I don't want to spend most of my life rebuilding walls that are going to be torn down. Mine are staying down. That way, things will hurt less if I encourage it.

I'm not rushing to find someone knew to keep me company. The bricks will lay as they fall, so to speak. I'll let that person find me in due time. Who knows? They may just be right under my nose. Life's short, but I'm young. They rest of my life is ahead of me and I can spend my later years chasing cars. For now, I want to focus on family/friends and school... in that order.

I'm not looking for love; I'm looking for a best friend. Most of all... I'm searching for myself.

Tuesday, March 24, 2009

Post One-Hundred and Thirteen.

Tyler Durden subscribes to the theory that you cannot begin to live until you have hit rock bottom. Rock bottom says that you have hit the worst possible place in the human psyche. The only place you can go is up. Rock bottom says that you have to know and accept that you are going to die. You should not fear dying. Until you have no fear of death you are useless to the human race. Rock bottom says you are the all singing, all dancing crap of the universe. You are not a special and a unique butterfly. You are the same decaying matter as everyone else. We are all part of the same compost pile. (Revill)

I don't know if I'll ever be able to hit rock bottom, but surely I could try.

Monday, March 23, 2009

Post One-Hundred and Twelve.

This man is my future husband... just for being so awesome.

Sunday, March 22, 2009

Post One-Hundred and Eleven.

Research paper.
Biotech article for Bio.
World War II project.

Finish all by Wednesday.
Need to get a copy of my report card tomorrow.

There's some music I miss listening to.

Wednesday, March 18, 2009

Post One-Hundred and Ten.

"I couldn't sleep last night because I know that it's over between us. I'm not bitter anymore, because I know that what we had was real. And if in some distant place in the future we see each other in our new lives, I'll smile at you with joy and remember how we spent the summer beneath the trees, learning from each other and growing in love. The best love is the kind that awakens the soul and makes us reach for more, that plants a fire in our hearts and brings peace to our minds, and that's what you've given me. That's what I hope to give to you forever. I love you. I'll be seeing you." - Noah, The Notebook

I've decided to write a sort of goodbye to you. It's not really for you. More or less, it's just for closure for me. In all honesty, because we all know you'll probably never lay eyes on this.

I meant everything with value I ever told you. When I said I kept falling for you, I meant it. When I told you I loved you, I was so scared... but I stay true to my word. You were my best friend. I had to love you; I still do. Honestly, I'm still in love with you. I don't know how I could be. I mean, this was the first time I truly opened myself up to someone... and well, we saw how that played out. No matter how much I try, I really can't mean anything bad I try to say about you. I'm still not quite sure what that means about me.

I remember when you and I switched characters that first day and no one knew but Nerji. And yeah, you didn't know he knew. I'm sorry we liked to play jokes. But I remember how embarrassed and mad I was at him when he told you that I liked you and needed to make my move-- you thinking he didn't know it was you. 'Cos I remember how shocked you were and how you wouldn't tell me exactly what he said unlike what you did for everything else. What struck me most curious was the whole "When the time comes" sort of line you sent me. I really didn't catch on to what that meant... and maybe I should have sooner.

Y'know, when we hung out for homecoming... that was probably one of the best days I've had. And, no... not just because that was my real first kiss. It was because I got to hang out with you. You got along with my friends. And, hey... though short lived, I enjoyed our slow dances. I wanted to kiss you right then, but I didn't. I was so shy and didn't want to be too forward. But, what do ya know? You got the guts before I could later on. Thanks for not being such of a wuss as I am. I'm glad that Jenn and Jess helped me along with that... because if they didn't, there was no way I would've even thought of asking you.

Sorry I couldn't sleep on the couch with you. I'm sorry I was too shy to play karaoke with everyone to begin with. You heard me, though... you know I sound awful. We all had a blast that day. That was my favourite Music at the Mall. I remember sitting on the table with you... just sitting. When your arm would touch mine or would be around me, the skin that came in contact would get all tingly and I would get little butterflies in the pit of my stomach. I loved how when it wasn't your turn during pool, you would come over to me and just stand between my legs. And how your shoulder was just the perfect height for me to rest my chin on... and we'd lean in almost close enough to kiss, then I'd bury my face in your neck. And how you always smelled so clean. I wanted so bad to keep your hoodie because it smelled like you and it was so warm.

I loved how you knew my little quirks and idiosyncrasies. How I'd bite my lip whenever you said something I though was cute, then break out in a huge grin at the next thing. I never made sense and ranted about nonsense. I loved how I could trust you with all my secrets and how you didn't mind my insecurities.

I don't hate you. I'm not mad anymore. I'm disappointed... I thought you were more of a man than you proved to be. We can still be friends. Things will be different, though. I'll be around. When you've grown up a bit, give me a call. Until then, I'm going to do my best to move on.

I'm writing this letter to you
In hope to clear my head
My thoughts are only of you
And it's funny how to you I'm dead
How did we end up like this?
When did we become such a mess?
And here I am digging my own grave

Monday, March 16, 2009

One-Hundred and Nine.

Today has been decent. I'm smiling more each day.

I spent most of my weekend with Korie. I missed her. We watched the greatest opera ever. Ok, so... it wasn't the greatest. But it was Repo! The Genetic Opera, or something along those lines. I liked it. Paris Hilton and Alexa Vega is in it... y'know, the girl from Spy Kids. We also watched... Quarantine, Nick and Norah's Infinite Playlist, and PotC:3. We didn't get to the other three.

The way you're singing in your sleep
The way you look before you leap
The strange illusions that you keep
You don't know
But I'm noticing

Sunday, March 15, 2009

Post One-Hundred and Eight.

This just fits.

Friday, March 13, 2009

Post One-Hundred and Seven.

I just want to say... lol@Devin'slaptophavingaTrojanvirus.

Art II has to be the most fun I've had in a while. Like... I'm not even kidding. The only downside is that the plaster we're working with dries out my skin really bad... and well, I get plaster all over my clothes. I've washed my Bayside hoodie about a dozen times in the past week or so. So crazy! Though, I've been having a blast. Um... let's see. We had to do water colour prints on clear plastic, ten run them through a printing press for a monoprint. When I get mine back, I might scan some and put them up. I'm working on a NES controller plaster statue that I might also turn into a candle holder. I'm almost finished with my wasted cast I did of pacman... I just have to paint it. I swear it's super cute... especially because when I was originally carving it out of clay to pour plaster on... I forgot that I should carve words how I would see them and not opposite. <.<; So, I carved them in mirror image... so when I poured plaster into the plaster mold I made... my words came out mirror image. My bad. ]: But! It still looks decent. My hand mold is almost done. I just need to poor the slip into it. Also, my fail-looking Batman paper cast is almost done. xD

I'm excited. [:

Thursday, March 12, 2009

Post One-Hundred and Six.

I hate that I can't bring myself to hate you.

... and I can't mean anything bad I try to say about you.

Post One-Hundred and Five.

Sup. Lily, Pete, and I are sitting in the library. Just leave Pete. /h8. Now it's just Lily and Brookesany. Oh, Pete returned... he made me smell his soap... (-.-;).

Wednesday, March 11, 2009

Post One-Hundred and Four.

I was doing great yesterday until I saw him in WG. I don't know what's happened to me.

And, I can't find a tutu/petticoat for my dress. ):

So, I've been listening to this song like all last night...

Tuesday, March 10, 2009

Post One-Hundred and Three.

So... we had to do acrostics in Lit today. I thought I'd share mine, even if I made it up in class since I kinda forgot about the assignment. ><;
Determination of one person
In turn will inspire another.
Silence when one's tongue should be held shows
Control. Calmness is key, especially
If a situation goes south. Never go with the
Population as a whole, if that's not your voice.
Learn with time to keep your wit about you.
Inside, a battle wells between impulse and mind.
Never can impulse win when in the
End it will lead to your destruction.

Post One-Hundred and Two.

So... weekend events reported:
  • Concert canceled.

  • Guitarist had to have surgery due to a blood clot.

  • Surgery went well and we're all hoping for a good recovery.

  • Trip to Iowa City in sued instead of Decatur/St. Louis.

  • Was decently fun... Deathnote shirt. (:

  • Lost on the way home and ended up in Muscatine. xD

  • Heavy rain storm!

  • Bonding experience in the car during wait.

  • Ended up home just fine!

  • Music@theMall fun.

  • Every day's an opportunity for a brighter tomorrow. My head's high. My chin's up.
    Smile wide--I'm gonna shine. Tattooed mistakes will fade with time. Things will be just fine. The soundtrack of my summer through the fall lost it's luster in the winter and it went missing before the spring.

    Jessica's got this song stuck in my head.

    Monday, March 9, 2009

    Post One-Hundred and One.

    I want to taste the rain on my tongue. I want to see a rainbow. I want to smile as wide as I can. I want true happiness that only comes around once in a blue moon. I want friends in highly low places. When I'm older, I want to wake up every morning knowing the person sleeping next to me loves me for me. I want to stop and smell the flowers. I want life not to pass me by. I want to bake cupcakes for someone just because. I want everything and more. Most of all, I want you and I want to see you smile.

    This song makes me feel better about life... I don't know why.

    Thursday, March 5, 2009

    Post One-Hundred.

    I'm doing well. I'm doing well. My dreams lately have been crazy. I'm a bit bitter lately--my friends have noticed. I don't mean to be. I'm sorry. I'm not quite sure what's going through my head right now. Honestly, it's infuriating. I don't know. I don't know. Will I be thought less of if I cry? Yell? I don't even know if I can be mad at you. I could forgive you if you let me.

    I went with Steph and Jess to pawn stuff. We cleared $40 with just old games and movies we don't watch. Jen's getting like $20-30. Then, Jess is getting whatever her grandma is giving her. Now just to figure out what to wear for the gig. Something comfortable! Icon for Hire, we're making it.

    These guys put a smile on my face. (:

    Tuesday, March 3, 2009

    Post Ninety-Nine.

    I'm not sure how I'm feeling exactly... Many things come to mind.

  • confused

  • upset

  • angry

  • etc.

  • But honestly... most of all, I feel hurt.


    Saturday, February 28, 2009

    Post Ninety-Eight.

    Karaoke is such a blast. I could care less that I pretty much suck. I won't lie, I'm a beast on those guy songs. Jessica and I did a kick ass duet of a few songs. Jenjen kept making fun of me wen we did duets. D: Haven't hung out with Nick in forever. That was nice. I think everyone had fun. The Omen ... lame movie. But, we still all jumped a couple feet in the air for a few parts.

    Hmm. I'm not sure what to expect in the weeks to come.

    Friday, February 27, 2009

    Post Ninety-Seven.

    I was told to be more assertive... more forceful. I'm not exactly sure if I can do that.I dunno. It's not really... me.

    Wednesday, February 25, 2009

    Post Ninety-Six.

    Maybe I should just have you read all I've posted ever.
    Sometimes I wonder if you've ever checked my blog, or remember I have one.

    I didn't want others to get involved. I didn't want things to get messy. I'm sorry. Okay, I mean it. I really am sorry. You're probably really mad at me. Could you tell me that? I'd rather you tell me than bottle it all up. You can yell at me if you want.

    Relationships are give and take. I'm ready to talk things out. Just you and me; no one else. I'll have them stay out of things if you just listen to what I have to say. I'll listen to your side, too.

    Tuesday, February 24, 2009

    Post Ninety-Five.

    Nerji's sister is way more cool than he is.
    The end.

    Post Ninety-Four.

    So, GeekCore is in progress. gXc! Here's some roughies of what we have right now...

    Ughh, pictures so big, but I can't be arsed to resize right now. I'm feeling icky again. I was super great today until art and Ethan brought some things up. Does that make me weak?

    Post Ninety-Three.

    I hate how people can't spell. Now, I don't mean an every once in a while mistake. I'm talking about those people with atrocious spelling. I know some can't help it... they're just bad at everything. But, by George, use a fuggin' dictionary next time son!


    Post Ninety-Two.

    Gawd, I've been sounding so freaking depressing lately. It makes me even more depressed, honestly! But, I don't know... I can't help myself. I'm having ups and downs. I do fine until I'm overwhelmed with things that well... remind me.

    This cheered me up...
    I don't know how that will end up looking. But, eh... it's supposed to be a cute bunny. And it's all like "Rawr." :/ Rawr... we used to always say that.

    Screw it. Forget what I said. I'm calling you tomorrow. Well, I guess... technically today. You probably won't answer... but, eh. It's worth a shot, right?

    I'm not giving up just yet.

    I can't help but close my eyes for life
    And dream a different ending
    When I wake I won't be so exhausted
    And I'll stop with my pretending
    That I'm fine; I'm fine if I can fool myself tonight
    And my lie will drown out all of yours

    Monday, February 23, 2009

    Post Ninety-One.

    So, Petey sorta fixed my belt buckle for me. Y'know... my NES controller one. Well, it came back to me as a necklace instead. At first I was kinda pissed. 'Cos well, I told him I knew how to fix it, and I could do it myself. But he offered... so, yeah. I let him have it for the weekend. He told me it was impossible to fix it as a buckle, and just made it into a necklace. I can't complain too much. He tried, and people really like it. I need to find a longer chain eventually. 'Cos, honestly... it's a bit goofy how it rests just on my boobs. I still like it.

    JenJen let me borrow her copies of Backdrop's CD and Icon For Hire's EP. Yummy. I've been listening to Backdrop as of now because I just got it ripped onto my compy. Their bassist is uber cute. (: We'll, they're all cute. But, I've got to admit, bassists are always better. Maybe it's just because I have a soft spot for bassists 'cos I am one. Then again, I have a soft spot for drummers too. Hmmm... who knows.

    I got this thing from NCLS in the mail. Um... National Student Leadership Conference. I guess my counselor suggested me or something. It's a summer college program thing. Though, the tuition is kinda pricey. I don't know if my dad would let me do it. The ones I want to do aren't in Chicago anywho... they're in New York. So, doubts my dad will let me do it. Though, it would be a great thing to do for college. I mean... if you complete your stay, you get a Certificate of Achievement, a transcript for what you've done... so like, college credit in whatever program you signed up for. Depending on which one you do, you get 1 to 3 college credits. Which, honestly... that'd be super sweet. Also, you get a letter of recommendation that you can submit to colleges when you're filling all the applications out. Honestly, I think that's hella rad. I'll have to talk to him about it. Maybe he'll look past the price. <.<; Al least I don't want to do the business abroad! That's about $5500. I wonder if he'd let me go to New York... then I could do the Entrepreneurship and Business. Then again, that's still pricy. :/ $2400... ouch. I could do the Inside the Arts or Mastering Leadership at Chicago! $1600 for either. Hmm. I don't know. I'll talk to him about it. Still so pricey. ><;

    Enjoy Backdrop. (:

    Post Ninety.

    I think I'm doing a bit better.

    There's still some songs I can't bring myself to listen to like I used to.
    And if I do, it usually isn't pretty.
    It's not too bad anymore.
    I just get upset.

    I don't know.
    Talk to me again. :/
    A simple hi would suffice.
    Nothing special.
    I don't know.

    Sunday, February 22, 2009

    Post Eighty-Nine.


    Ok, so at M@TM, Icon for Hire played. They were abso' amazing. I'm not even kidding. Even though I didn't know hardly any of the words, I sang all that I remembered. They put on an amazing show. Not even kidding. The bassist Josh took JenJen's camera and took pictures while they were on stage. It was sweet. It was just... ahhh, the crowd was so involved in their show. I loved it.
    Though, the other two bands before hand were hella rad too--Kidnap the Sun and Backdrop.

    The second band to play (KTS) reminded me of New Found Glory in a way.
    Um... IFH signed my Jackass Converse. Even though they smelled bad... my shoes, I mean. 'Cos well, they're like... ancient. I want to say that they're about three or four years old. Honestly, they don't smell too bad. Adam, the drummer (Happy Birthday!), gave them a big whiff before signing them. Epic.

    Oh! I had a midnight curfew for like... the first time in ages. Usually my dad will tell me if I go to M@TM that I need to be back when it's over/by 11. But, no... he told me I had to be back by midnight. I was pretty shocked. Though, I was in by 11:30. 'Cos, y'know... I'm a good kid and all. Well, more so that Stephanie needed to get home. We sat and talked a bit. It was cool.

    I got a banana from Sonic. Yummy.

    I swear Josh almost gave Jess or JenJen his phone number 'cos he wanted us to go to their St. Louis show. o.0 Yeah, ikr. But, a bunch of people were talking and he had his phone out, but no one was paying attention to him. Well, besides me 'cos he was talking first. Anywho, yeah... fun. Jess got Josh to give Stephanie a hug. I bet she was super excited. Smile, smile.

    ... maybe someday.

    Saturday, February 21, 2009

    Post Eighty-Eight.

    I needed a night like last night.
    Even though there were some downs, the ups were way more worth it.
    We watched the new Friday the 13th.
    The opening was like 30 minutes long.
    We all had a good talk and bitch fest.
    I ended up crying down by the river.
    But, I had friends with me.
    It was fine.
    We watched scary moviesss.
    It was fun.

    Friday, February 20, 2009

    Post Eighty-Seven.

    Pete is my backup prom date.
    He knows it.
    He's cool with it.
    That means I'll be ok if the whole Andrew thing falls through.

    Post Eighty-Six.

    Supposedly you have no life if you have seen over 85 of these. (:

    Mark the ones you've seen. There are 239 films on this list. Copy this list and paste this as a note. Then, put X's next to the films you've seen, add them up, change the header adding your number, and click post at the bottom. Have fun.

    (X) Rocky Horror Picture Show
    (X) Grease
    (X) Pirates of the Caribbean
    (x) Pirates of the Caribbean 2: Dead Man's Chest
    (X) Boondock Saints
    (X) Fight Club
    (X) Starsky and Hutch
    (X) Neverending Story
    ( ) Blazing Saddles
    ( ) Airplane
    Total: 8

    (X) The Princess Bride
    (X) Anchorman
    (X) Napoleon Dynamite
    (X) Labyrinth
    (X) Saw
    (X) Saw II
    (X) White Noise
    ( ) White Oleander
    (X) Anger Management
    (X) 50 First Dates
    (x) The Princess Diaries
    (X) The Princess Diaries 2: Royal Engagement
    Total so far: 19

    (x) Scream
    (X)Scream 2
    (X) Scream 3
    (X) Scary Movie
    (X) Scary Movie 2
    (X) Scary Movie 3
    (X) Scary Movie 4
    (X) American Pie
    (X) American Pie 2
    (X) American Wedding
    (X) American Pie Band Camp
    Total so far: 30

    (X) Harry Potter 1
    (X) Harry Potter 2
    (X) Harry Potter 3
    (X) Harry Potter 4
    (X) Resident Evil 1
    (X) Resident Evil 2
    (X) The Wedding Singer
    (X) Little Black Book
    (X) The Village
    (X) Lilo & Stitch
    Total so far: 40

    (X) Finding Nemo
    (X) Finding Neverland
    (X) Signs
    (X) The Grinch
    (X) Texas Chainsaw Massacre
    (X) Texas Chainsaw Massacre: The Beginning
    (x) White Chicks
    (X) Butterfly Effect
    (X) 13 Going on 30
    (X) I, Robot
    (X) Robots
    Total so far: 51

    (X) Dodgeball: A True Underdog Story
    ( ) Universal Soldier
    (X) Lemony Snicket: A Series Of Unfortunate Events
    (X) Along Came Polly
    (X) Deep Impact
    (X) KingPin
    (X) Never Been Kissed
    (X) Meet The Parents
    (X) Meet the Fockers
    (X) Eight Crazy Nights
    (X) Joe Dirt
    Total so far: 62

    (X) A Cinderella Story
    (X) The Terminal
    (X) The Lizzie McGuire Movie
    ( ) Passport to Paris
    (X) Dumb & Dumber
    (X) Dumber & Dumberer
    (X) Final Destination
    (X) Final Destination 2
    (X) Final Destination 3
    (X) Halloween
    (X) The Ring
    (X) The Ring 2
    ( ) Surviving X-MAS
    (X) Flubber
    Total so far: 73

    (X) Harold and Kumar go to white castle
    ( ) Practical Magic
    (X) Chicago
    (X) Ghost Ship
    (X)From Hell
    (X) Hellboy
    (X) Secret Window
    (X) I Am Sam
    ( ) The Whole Nine Yards
    ( ) The Whole ten yards
    Total so far: 80

    (X) The Day After Tomorrow
    (X) Child's Play
    (X) Seed of Chucky
    (X) Bride of Chucky
    (X)Ten Things I Hate About You
    (X) Just Married
    (X) Gothika
    (X) Nightmare on Elm street
    ( ) Sixteen Candles
    (X) Remember the Titans
    ( ) Coach Carter
    (X) The Grudge
    (X) The Grudge 2
    (X) The Mask
    (X) Son Of The Mask
    Total so far: 93

    (X) Bad Boys
    (X) Bad Boys 2
    (X) Joy Ride
    (X) Lucky Number Slevin
    (X) Ocean's Eleven
    (X) Ocean's Twelve
    (X) Bourne Identity
    (X) Bourne Supremecy
    ( )Lone Star
    ( ) Bedazzled
    (X) Predator I
    (X) Predator II
    (X) The Fog
    (X) Ice Age
    (X) Ice Age 2: The Meltdown
    ( ) Curious George
    Total so far: 106

    (X) Independence Day
    (X) Cujo
    ( ) A Bronx Tale
    (X) Darkness Falls
    (X) Christine
    (X) ET
    (X) Children of the Corn
    (x) My Boss's Daughter
    (X) Maid in Manhattan
    (X) War of the Worlds
    (X) Rush Hour
    (X) Rush Hour 2
    Total so far: 117

    ( ) Best Bet
    (X) How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days
    ( ) She's All That
    (X) Calendar Girls
    (X) Sideways
    (X) Mars Attacks
    ( ) Event Horizon
    (X) Ever After
    (X) Wizard of Oz
    (X) Forrest Gump
    ( ) Big Trouble in Little China
    (X) The Terminator
    (X) The Terminator 2
    (X) The Terminator 3
    Total so far: 127

    (X) X-Men
    (X) X-2
    (X) X-3
    (X) Spider-Man
    (X) Spider-Man 2
    ( ) Sky High
    (X) Jeepers Creepers
    (X) Jeepers Creepers 2
    (X) Catch Me If You Can
    (X) The Little Mermaid
    (X) Freaky Friday
    (X) Reign of Fire
    ( ) The Skulls
    (X) Cruel Intentions
    ( ) Cruel Intentions 2
    (X) The Hot Chick
    (X) Shrek
    (X) Shrek 2
    Total so far: 142

    (X) Swimfan
    (X) Miracle on 34th street
    (X) Old School
    (X) The Notebook
    (X) K-Pax
    ( ) Krippendorf's Tribe
    (X) A Walk to Remember
    ( ) Ice Castles
    (X) Boogeyman
    (X) The 40-year-old Virgin
    Total so far: 150

    (X) Lord of the Rings Fellowship of the Ring
    (X) Lord of the Rings The Two Towers
    (X) Lord of the Rings Return Of the King
    (X) Indiana Jones and the Raiders of the Lost Ark
    (X) Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom
    (X) Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade
    Total so far:156

    ( ) Basketball
    (X) Hostel
    ( ) Waiting for Guffman
    (X) House of 1000 Corpses
    (X) Devils Rejects
    (X) Elf
    (X) Highlander
    (X) Mothman Prophecies
    (X) American History X
    ( ) Three
    Total so Far: 163

    (X) The Jacket
    (X) Kung Fu Hustle
    ( ) Shaolin Soccer
    ( ) Night Watch
    (X) Monsters Inc.
    (X) Titanic
    (X) Monty Python and the Holy Grail
    (X) Shaun Of the Dead
    (X) Willard
    Total so far: 170

    ( ) High Tension
    (X) Club Dread
    (X) Hulk
    (X) Dawn Of the Dead
    (X) Hook
    (X) Chronicles Of Narnia: The Lion the Witch and the Wardrobe
    (X) 28 Days Later
    ( ) Orgazmo
    ( ) Phantasm
    ( ) Waterworld
    Total so far: 176

    (X) Kill Bill vol 1
    (X) Kill Bill vol 2
    (X) Mortal Kombat
    (X) Wolf Creek
    (X) Kingdom of Heaven
    (X) The Hills Have Eyes
    ( ) I Spit on Your Grave aka the Day of the Woman
    ( ) The Last House on the Left
    ( ) Re-Animator
    (X) Army of Darkness
    Total so far: 183

    (X) Star Wars Ep. I The Phantom Menace
    (X) Star Wars Ep. II Attack of the Clones
    (X) Star Wars Ep. III Revenge of the Sith
    (X) Star Wars Ep. IV A New Hope
    (X) Star Wars Ep. V The Empire Strikes Back
    (X) Star Wars Ep. VI Return of the Jedi
    ( ) Ewoks Caravan Of Courage
    (X) Ewoks The Battle For Endor
    Total so far: 190

    (X) The Matrix
    (X) The Matrix Reloaded
    (X) The Matrix Revolutions
    (X) Evil Dead
    ( ) Evil Dead 2
    (X) Team America: World Police
    (X) Red Dragon
    (X) Silence of the Lambs
    (X) Hannibal
    Total: 199/239

    Thursday, February 19, 2009

    Post Eighty-Five.

    My room is always freezing lately. I don't know what's up with that. Even with my little heater on, it doesn't really help.

    So, this has to be one of my favourite Bring Me The Horizon songs...

    Post Eighty-Four.

    Sometimes I can't stand myself...
    Because I'm such a procrastinator.

    I can't do it Jessica, sorry. I'll wait it out. I'm not giving up. So, I'll either... regret doing so later on, or be glad I did. Whatever happens, happens.

    I need to get a job. My new bass/amp won't pay for themselves. Plus, my dad keeps getting on me about it. He's like, "Blahblah you need a job blah."


    Blockbuster maybe?
    I dunno... finding places within walking distance limits me a bit.

    Wednesday, February 18, 2009

    Post Eighty-Three.

    I've been trying to distract myself for the past couple of days.
    My new project is learning First Date - Blink 182.
    I'm excited.

    Post Eighty-Two.

    I'll give him some space.
    A week or so.
    Maybe things will go back to normal.
    Maybe they won't; I can only hope for the best.

    I've been joking lately with my friends about new future prospects.
    But, that's not what I really want.

    Today is Wednesday. (:
    I'm so excited.
    Only because... Saturday isn't far off.
    And! I've actually got money to get into M@TM.
    AND! Icon For Hire will be playing.
    It'll be their second show; I didn't see the first.
    But, I've listened to their CD that Jessica has.
    And, well... I love them.
    Usually, I don't like girl singers.
    But, jeeze... she's good.

    Tuesday, February 17, 2009

    Post Eighty-One.

    We had a pep assembly today.
    Pete played with my jiggle.
    Y'know, like... arm jiggle.
    The mic was up way hella loud.
    It freaked me out.
    I jumped.
    And cursed.
    I was scared.

    Post Eighty.

    I'm not quite sure what to do.
    All my memories are fading.
    Close my eyes; you don't look quite the same.
    Listen to your voice mail just to hear your voice.
    I don't know what's happening.

    Sunday, February 15, 2009

    Post Seventy-Nine.

    I think I'm losing my mind.
    I can't be cooped up in this house.
    I need to get out.

    I broke down watching Juno last night.
    Throughout the movie I ended up crying like... three times.

    Things aren't sitting right with me.

    Saturday, February 14, 2009

    Post Seventy-Eight.

    For some reason, I think I did something really wrong.

    Post Seventy-Seven.

    Happy V-day everyone.

    Friday, February 13, 2009

    Post Seventy-Six.

    Posting my Ryuk sketch so anyone who doesn't have me on facebook can see... aka: Nerji. Nub. Do note that it isn't complete... and probably won't be completed. His face is so hard to draw. D:

    And here's um... I'm not sure, but I liked it.

    Post Seventy-Five.

    I hope you know your words hurt... probably more than they should.

    Thursday, February 12, 2009

    Post Seventy-Four.

    I keep getting things in the mail for colleges.
    It's cool I'm getting mail for once.
    But... it's all colleges. ; ;
    Someone send me mail!

    Post Seventy-Three.

    I found this epic. :x

    Wednesday, February 11, 2009

    Post Seventy-Two.

    Everyone keeps asking me if this is about Andrew...
    But, it's not. o.0
    I was just listening to ATL/PWT and it kinda just stuck in my head. Hmm, anywho, here it goes.
    I know, I know, needs work.
    And way so angsty sappy bleh.
    Part of it's actually lines from Fatal Attraction. xD

    I should’ve known better than this
    A sweet kiss isn’t eternal bliss
    Time is fleeting
    I’m still here dreaming, believing

    You knew, you knew it from the start
    You and I wouldn’t make it quite this far
    You knew, you knew it from the start
    You and I were supposed to be apart

    Why can’t we close our eyes,
    And count up to ten?
    Let the rain fall in our faces,
    And pretend this never happened?
    Can’t believe the effect you have on me

    Close my eyes and all I see is you
    Breathe in and all I smell is you
    Listen close and all I hear is you
    Reach out; I swear I can feel you
    Mind racing, thoughts of only you
    It’s always been just you…
    But you…

    You knew, you knew it from the start
    You and I wouldn’t make it quite this far
    You knew, you knew it from the start
    You and I were supposed to be apart
    You knew, you knew it from the start
    You were gonna break my heart

    Post Seventy-One.

    So, last night my dad kinda flipped on me when we were at Cassie's mom's house.
    Because Chris was talking about wanting to play beer pong with his dad when he graduates, right?
    Well, Cassie and my dad didn't know what that was.
    I did, so I explained.
    So he's kinda like, "OMG HOW DO YOU KNOW?!?!?!" Minus the yelling.
    So he probably thinks I'm a bad kid.
    But, hey...
    Andrew's the one who told me what beer pong was.

    Post Seventy.

    Sometimes, guys make me want to go lesbian.
    But then again, vaginas are scary.

    I'll become a hermit.
    Since, y'know... not being religious wouldn't really work out being a nun.

    Post Sixty-Nine.

    Prom's on April 18th.
    We're already making plans.
    There will be a blog...

    Our Prom Blog.

    That should work.

    Friday, February 6, 2009

    Post Sixty-Eight.


    That is all.

    Tuesday, February 3, 2009

    Post Sixty-Seven.

    You suck.

    Ok, anyway.
    Half day of school today.
    Jen, Steph, and I went and ate out at pizza hut.
    We danced in the booth to music on the jukebox.
    It was awesome like.
    Jen almost killed us taking Steph home.
    Oh, well.
    We washed her car.
    She sprayed me with the hose.

    Sunday, February 1, 2009

    Post Sixty-Six.

    1) Do you like anyone?​​​

    2) Are you a flirt?
    Just a bit, I guess.

    3) Are you a player?​​​
    No way.

    4) Would​ you get back together with any of your exes?​​
    I have no clue.

    5) Have you ever kissed anyone on your top friends?​
    I want to say... yes? I don't remember who my top friends are tbh.

    6) Do you want a valentine?​​​

    7) Are you SINGLE?​​​
    No ma'am.

    8) Do you prefer group dates or single ones?​​​
    I haven't been on enough dates to care.

    9) Would you kiss light or make out sessions?​​​
    Eh, whichever?

    10) Do you like cuddling up while​ watching a movie​?​​​

    11) Any plans for valentines day?
    I have no clue.

    12) What' s the best valentines day present for a girl?​​
    You tell me.

    13) For a guy?
    No clue.

    14) What is special about the day?
    Make people feel lonely and to make money off of card! D<

    Post Sixty-Five.

    You probably won't even read this, but whatever. I need to blow off some steam, and you're kinda ignoring me. Maybe not on purpose, but hey, things happen.

    Communication is key, right?

    Then tell me how you're feeling. Tell me what's wrong. You'd rather not talk about it. I'd rather not be worried it's something serious. I'd rather not be worried that it's most likely about me. You could tell me if it was. Maybe it won't bother me, or maybe I'll be hurt a bit... but I'd rather know what's going on, rather know the truth, than to believe it's something much worse.

    Maybe it's a guy thing. Who knows.

    I usually tell you what's up with me. Though, I always have this feeling you're not very concerned. Maybe I'll just stay silent about that stuff.

    Worry. Worry. Worry.
    That's all I've been doing.

    When I tell you sometimes I worry about you, I lie.
    I'm always worrying about you, and I always have.
    You were my best friend before you became more.

    Whatever you do, please don't lie to me.

    Friday, January 30, 2009

    Post Sixty-Four.

    How to Survive a Zombie Invasion.

    That is the topic of my research paper for Lit/Comp III on Survival.
    Eat your freaking heart out.
    It will be BA.
    It will be awesome.
    You will be jealous.

    I want to get the Zombie Attack survival book to use for it.
    I might, but I don't know yet.
    I'm definitely using Shaun of the Dead as a reference.

    Post Sixty-Three.

    I look, but I don't see.
    I hear, but I don't listen.
    I touch, but I don't feel.

    Thursday, January 29, 2009

    Post Sixty-Two.

    I cried again, just a bit ago. Two days in a row. I hate crying. I really do. I'm ugly when I cry. We all are. It's just a disgusting thing. It's weak. I'm weak.

    I wish I couldn't say why I'm upset, but I know why. I know all too well. I find it kind of selfish of me, honestly. Things are far from the same when it started. Cute turned to crude. I hate it. I hate what things have become. Is it my fault? Is it yours? Single blame is far from fair. We both played a part, I'm sure.

    Is it selfish that I wish things were back to what they were before?
    I miss long discussions of nothing in particular.
    I miss intelligent conversations.
    I miss times that were adorable.
    I miss when things seemed innocent.
    I miss the old joking around.

    Things change quickly. Life never stops. But what if I wasn't really ready? What if I wasn't prepared of what was to come? Was I okay with everything? I thought I was.

    I'm still a kid.

    Did I ask for too much?
    In return, was too much asked from me?

    What was here left.
    Will it ever return?

    Please return.
    I miss what has been lost.

    Post Sixty-One.

    Hmm... everyone kept calling today Gay Pride Day. But, It was GSA Pride Day... so, eh.
    Though, it was a huge success. Only a few teachers refused to support--one in particular I expected to do so. Edler totally went on a rand about how they were hypocritical Christians by doing so. Also said how she would go the other way once she got rid of her husband. Oh, love Edler. I defo love Hogan to... because he talked about it during class and how it was the American way to be tolerant and we all need to accept everyone, no matter skin or sexuality or anything else. Even Mr. Mendenhall wore a ribbon! Ahhhh, so excited.

    Not feeling so hot lately. Iunno, just down.
    Not cool. Not cool at all.

    stup flaming ok! btw u suk frum no on evry tim sum1 flams me im gona slit muh ristsz!

    Ah, I love inside jokes.

    Wednesday, January 28, 2009

    Post Sixty.

    So, I'm sitting next to Jessica. Its early and we're waiting for everyone to show up for the meeting this morning.

    Pete's mustache smells like dog, but it's hella sexy and bitchin'. WURD. I'm so jealous and so is Jessica.

    I wish I was in pajamas right now. Like Nicole. Lucky bitch.

    Pete's talking bout oranges. Fucking Mexican. Now I want oranges. GDI.

    End post.

    (NOTE: Had to copy and paste from Jessica's later on because the computer I was using wouldn't submit post. Q.Q)

    Tuesday, January 27, 2009

    Post Fifty-Nine.

    I've been slacking on posts. Hell, I've been slacking on everything online.

    I'll have to message me mum back on myspace... She messaged me ages ago and I just can't be arsed to write up a message. I've actually got a whole bunch that I need to respond to. I read them all... just don't write back. Yeah, yeah... I know: Lazy.

    I think I'm going to start making me a pitcher of green tea. Because, I mean... we're not using the kool-aid pitcher anymore. So, mmm... green tea.

    I love toasted bagels. I don't mean warmed up ones in the toaster. I mean toasted ones in the toaster. Q.Q So delicious. I like toasted things in general, honestly. Not when people are toasted... or baked... though. Drugs just... to each his own, I suppose.

    I'm enjoying taking Art II already.

    Wednesday, January 14, 2009

    Post Fifty-Eight.

    It's crazy how we become so different in such a short time.

    "Nothing is ever really lost, or can be lost, no birth, identity, form--no object of the world, nor life, nor force, nor any visible thing;...the body, sluggish, aged, cold--the embers left from earlier fires,...shall duly flame again."
    — Walt Whitman

    Wednesday, January 7, 2009

    Post Fifty-Seven.

    Fallacies of Logic Skit

    Jennifer is driving and gets pulled over with Lily and Megan with her.

    Brookesany: License and registration ma’am.

    Jennifer: It’s under all these bibles, hold on.

    Lily and Megan: Yeah

    Jennifer, Lily, and Megan search through the car, pulling out many bibles, among other random artifacts within the car.

    Brookesany: I really need that license and registration ma’am.

    Jennifer: Why?

    Brookesany: Did you see how fast you were going?

    Jennifer: I know how fast I was going, but did you see the guy in front of me? He was going way faster and he was all jamming out to his loud music. It looked like he was going to a party. Do you know what’s at parties? Chicks and booze. Do you know what happens with chicks and booze? I know. Do you know? I don’t know, do you know? You know. (Jennifer continues to ramble. . .)

    Brookesany: Ma’am, just forget it. You can go.